People keep telling me that this is the case but what if it doesn’t?
What if all the jobs I am applying for (mostly library/museums) are just not
right for me and people take one look at my application form (because most
people don’t even accept CVs) and think what was she even thinking? She is totally
unsuitable for the job. What if the career path that I am wanting to pursue is totally
wrong for me?
I am constantly being told to look into book keeping and
that I would be really good at it and we all know that you should play to your strengths
but are we not also told that we should go for the kind of jobs that we enjoy
doing so that we look forward to going to work in the morning?
As I keep on trying to get through my quarter life crisis
(or maybe it’s just a normal nervous breakdown) I am reminded that I’m not
alone in this as everybody is insecure and scared even if they are better at hiding
it than others. Life is scary as hell, I mean one minute you think you know
what you want and the next minute you are graduating and are standing on the
precipice of life with no harness or safety rope to help you and the guides
that you were trying to follow have long since disappeared.
It is now quite a long time since I graduated and I still haven’t
got very far off that cliff as I am literally and metaphorically speaking
scared of heights and just as Augustus Waters said in The Fault In Our Stars “I
fear oblivion….I fear it like the proverbial blind man who’s afraid of the
dark.” But oblivion is inevitable just as is failure and it’s the mark of a
brave person who can pick themselves back up after the have failed. The
question is are you brave enough to try in the first place?
So I’ll carry on applying for jobs even if it comes to
nought because all you can really do is try even if you have no idea what you
are doing.
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