I have a daily dilemma with the world of singledom.
Sometimes it’s great and I’m like:
When people complain about what their significant other may
or (more often than not) may not have done I can just sit back and smugly grin
to myself and say that I do not have that problem.
I don’t have to worry about anyone else; to be single is to
be free and you have no one to hold you back, no one to stop you from going and
doing whatever you want to do. But at the same time there is no one to share
your experiences with, no one to be there for you, no one to call in the middle
of the night when you get lonely (ok maybe not that one because that would just
be annoying and they’d probably kill you for disturbing their sleep)
Being single is a confirmation that you will not settle for
the first fish in the sea, you will wait until someone comes along that is
worthy of your love. It sure does get lonely sometimes.
But at the same time being single feels like staring down a
gaping rock face with no safety net, nothing to catch you if you fall. To put it plainly:
I went to a wedding and an engagement party this weekend and with all the happy couples surrounding me, well it was honestly exhausting. Pretending to be happy for your friends when they are glowing with happiness at having found the right one for them when you are silently dying inside out of loneliness. Excuse me whilst I go sob in the bathroom.
You may argue that I am merely just not trying hard enough but lets just say that any attempts at anything even slightly flirtatious are more awkward than a socially awkward penguin. I even tried online dating briefly (ok maybe not so briefly) and it did not go well... so sorry if I'm not bouncing up and down telling you to get online
